great way to start 2008...

yes.. i woke up with a high fever on my FIRST day of class this morning. Can't do anything but feel every single muscle of my body ache.
Went to the doc, he told me i had throat infections n the left side of my throat had blisters n practically red and swollen. Besides that, i had cough, flu and headache...

i hate eating medicine... Bluek~

:(

til then.

Flashbacks n thoughts of the very last day

hmm... finally...

The last day of the year.

Time passes us by so fast sometimes we don't even know it had just slyly slipped away. We only realise it when we OCCASIONALLY sit down and think about it. And that's if we DO take some time to think about it.

This has been a very meaningful year for me. Many things happened this year, which i would never ever trade for any other as it has given me a different outlook and experience. Let me recap.
I've been disappointed, backstabbed, heartbroken, broken down, injured physically, suicidal, wasted at some point...but there were also the good things behind the bad...I've competed in Japan representing Malaysia in cheerleading, fell so deeply in love with my passion-Dance, learnt from fantastic teachers, gotten into Dean's list (YAY!), did ballroom dance classes, discovered and gotten close with bunch of very very wonderful friends (u know who u are :D), and most of all, SURVIVE all that i've been through this year.

I'm pretty happy about all that i'm able to achieve this year, so i shall aim a little bit more next year. I personally don't believe in resolutions, because there's a tendency to break or forget them. Instead, i call them GOALS. You can't break or forget a goal, u may just only miss it if u don't score ;)

yeah... so
Goals for 2008

1. Improve grades.
2. Save more money. Make more money.
3. Sleep early.
4. Learn something outside of uni. (e.g latin ballroom/vocal lessons/new language etc)
5. Less junk n fast food (only once every two weeks, suppression period in between shall gradually increase)
6. Read more books. My gramatical errors will soon pile up and drown the world wide web. so...Get nerdy,babeh!
7. Allow myself at least 2 holidays on my own expense with people i heart. That's why i need to always refer to GOAL No.2
8. Go overseas at least once, just to learn/check out/experience anything related to dance, arts or cheerleading. That's why i ALSO need to always refer to GOAL No.2.

I admit i still need to improve in many many things, but i know for sure that i've learnt and grew up a bit compared to the year before. I'm happy the way things are now, just because...

• i have food, WARM FOOD, waiting on the table at home when i come back (I love my folks, really)
• i have clothes on my back (although going commando only invites u to be raped, killed and have cucumbers/brinjals/banana/cylindrical objects shoved into your u-know-where)
• i have a home to go back to, a room on my own.
• i have a shoulder to cry on, anywhere, anytime.
• i have a study course n future career that can continually make me smile when i think about it. It is a big thing when u love ur job n don't feel that waking up in the morning for work is a chore. Really, just ask any working person.
• i have people around me who loves me :)

And based on the reason, i just simply have reason to live. So come what may to 2008! Happy new year everybody! May the next year be a better year for improvement, achievement and contentment.

Have a wonderful holiday before the first working day of the year :)

sorry...i know i'm such a killjoy

til then

Jeng Jeng Jeng~

Today, i went out with EeVon, AhDiao n her sister,(real sisTAH ok? REAL one. *inside joke*) Michelle to Mid Valley. The sisters wanted to go for a haircut.. erm more of like a hair makeover, n with lots of pestering and huge puppy-eyed bugging by adelle, me n ee von oso sampat tagged along.

Well, actually i already wanted to do something with my head of hay for a long time but couldn't find the time. Or either, UNINSPIRED (read: lazy) to do anything to it. Since i have a bunch of friends coming, for the fun of it, why not?

And adelle had been bugging us for ages to "join the dark side"...

EeVon: hmm... i feel like doing something to my hair la...

Adelle: Cut short la.
EV: i dun want... tak sampai hati

A: Cut short nice ma.. short hair like mine :D

EV: -___-"

on other ocassions...

Me: I wanna change my look..sien adi
A: huh? Cut short la, cut short!! *jumping enthusiastic bubble*

Me: dun want la, short hair looks funny on me

A: won't wan... u shud try :D cut short!

Me: -____-"

And MANY occassions...

Me: I feel like trying XX hairstyle la... wat do u think?

A: Cut short la...
EV: hmm... not bad, can try. I feel like trying that one....

A: Cut short, cut short!

Me n EV: -_____________-" *super mata sepet look*

Then today, we have Adelle and her league member of the dark side, Michelle. Two hearts, 10,000X the power.
A: Cut short la.

M: pretty ma, hot also.. (something to that sort) *with the same enthusiatic jumping bubble*

We went to LMC, a trendy looking salon at MidValley near the cinema. The stylists and the staff were friendly and patient though we asked lots and lots of questions. (i'd give credit to that cuz i find asking a lot of questions can be irritating) So here are some pictures... well, some of it are those i risked my life taking it...

a very sporting Michelle with 2 "mock-pigtails" and a giggling Ee Von behind

A very tulan Adelle, with Jien-alike hair :D

Well... i know u've been anticipating how i'd looked like.. Apparently, i didn't exactly took picture of the process cuz i was sneezing like a bitch due to a cold i caught in the morning. So i only managed a before n after picture.

Here's a recap of how i looked BEFORE

I present to u....

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This is annoying but i like it :D

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TAAH DAAHHH~

i present to u my shamelessly narcissistic Japanese alter-ego, Michiko.

"Konichiwa, watashi wa Michiko-san"

*poses the infamous 125* *then proceeds to vomit*

What do u think? hehe...

Til Then

not so happy cheerleader

I HATE BROKEN PROMISES!
I HATE HALF-HEARTED APOLOGIES!
I HATE INSENSITIVE PEOPLE!
I HATE MEANINGLESS EXCUSES!
I HATE STUPID PEOPLE PULLING LONG FACES LIKE I OWE THEM!
I HATE INFLEXIBILITY!
DON'T SHOW ME FACES LIKE I POISONED YOUR DOG OR OWE U TEN MILLION BUCKS.
I WILL FUCKING SLAP THE SHIT OUT OF U. DAMNIT
I HATE I HATE I HATE!!!!

I DAMN FUCKING PISSED NOW I THINK I SHOULD GO TO BED.
my fucking kneecaps are screaming bitches again. cibai. it's not making things any better.

ROARRRRRRRRR!!!!

lalala~!

wheee~!!

I'm on DEAN'S LIST!!

LALALALA LALALALA~~

til then

That's why it's called a crush

To me, crushes are the most irritating thing to a person's mind.

It's the feeling u can't get enough of that certain someone, yet u will never want that person to know about how u feel. It gives u the rush of euphoria WHENEVER and WHEREVER u see or even just hear about that person. And everytime that person does something nice for u, that feeling just gives u a one-way-ticket to heaven. (don't deny, i'm sure u have been there at least once in your lifetime)

But it makes your world crumble (sometimes feel like disappearing) the moment when....

• he is in love with someone else
• he TELLS u he's in love with someone else
• he is taken
• he doesn't know how u feel (probably never will)
• he fell for your best friend/sibling/mother etc.. (don't laugh at the last option, it could happen)
• he KNOWS how u feel for him and avoids u, and falls for ur best friend/sibling/mother etc.
• he didn't turn out to be what u think he is

yeah.. it's shitty.. welcome to life.

I once had a crush on this guy way back when i was in secondary school. He was a senior whom i met during a stage performance for an annual school activity.

It wasn't exactly love at first sight as i hadn't had feelings for him when i first met him the previous year. He was more of an annoyance to me. He didn't talk much and always come late n leave early during the first few practices so i thought he was a bit cocky. Benci cocky people!!

Spending alot of time in weekly practices made me see him in a different light. We found out we had many things in common like interests, hobby, outlook in life and much more. Oh well, my feelings for him developed throughout the practices because of all the good qualities i see in him. He was smart, mature, charismatic, funny, athletic, caring and hardworking. I found out the reason that he was always late n left early cause he works part-time as he didn't want to burden his family. (omg,how not to like, u say leh?)

Well, almost perfect eh? But despite being such a perfect gentleman, i'm sure he KNOWS he is very much sought after. (all guys very perasan wan, they sure know..even if they r not they will think they r, trust me.) He was LOYAL. Yes, he is already taken. He never flirts with anybody in the group, and he doesn't simply say sohai things like "u got bf o not?" or "i will miss u one oh, u don't miss me meh?" to any girl. He is respectful with his words which made me fell for him even more. And no, as much as a stereotype to all guys like him, he is perfectly straight.

I didn't found out about his gf through him, as he never told me about his private life (SEE! somemore don't kiss n tell!), but eventually by word of mouth n the almighty WorldWideWeb aka friendster, myspace bla bla bla... (yes, i stalked him onlilne, ahahaha...)

So yeah, the moment i found out, i've decided i will keep my feelings a secret n take it to the grave with me. I will NEVER bring myself to steal other people's bf. And besides, relationships might not work out sometimes, and it's because u find something about the other person which is bad/annoying/irritating/hurtful. Which means, that person whom u deem to be so beautifully perfect isn't what he seemed to be. I secretly vowed i will make him my eternal PERFECT CRUSH. (ya la yalah, fucking childish i know... i'm only form 2 ok?)

Practices prior to the event was getting more n more tough but somehow it became an escape from classes and homework. Everybody was looking forward to practices every end of the week. Same for me, but i was hoping to see him instead. Good time passes fast and finally it was all over, and during the final day of the performance, he confessed that he admired my maturity and passion, and that he was comfortable working with me.

Can u imagine? I can bet u i flew to the moon and back a dozen times just hearing that. But i still didn't tell him how i feel. (i know, i'm a big fat loser.) i just let it pass by responding with a smile, more of a silly grin.wtf. -___-"

Many many years passed, i decided to surf on friendster on one particular day. I stumbled upon his profile page. I tell u ah, i can blush the first time when i see his page, like his pictures r looking back at me. wtfknnkkn. My heart still skips a beat when i see it now. Damn stupid i know... Then i saw it.. his status...CURRENT STATUS...

Male *age censored* single... SINGLE

He is single... He broke up with his long time sweetheart.

Suddenly those old feelings started burning like a flame, and my head was temporarily messed up for awhile with many silly thoughts of there's a chance we might be together, holding hands bla bla crap...

My heart flutters awhile. And finally, i still stood my ground. He will always be my perfect crush, cuz he will be an example of hope that there are good guys out there. Yes, my perfect crush, i wish u well and happiness, and thank you for being who u are.

Thought of the day: If u like to simply pass judgements just by reading some things people write, or before u knew what actually happened, i would advice u to click the red, small, X button on the upper right corner of the page and never come back again. and if u wanna be rude to leave rude comments, i will delete them :)

til then

p.s/ i will blog about the trip soon, cuz no pics yet... very boring wan...

yeah right...

yeah right...
just got back from vacation n there's loads to update.
now i gotta go for duty in KLpac soon, so...

til then